You’ve dated. A lot. You’ve dated enough to know what you want, and what you don’t want. In fact, if your ideal partner walked into the room right now, you’d know it was him.
But you’re still not finding that ideal guy. You continue to meet schmucks who fall short of the mark.
Let me help you out. You’re still not finding your ideal partner because you’re so focused on him and who he needs to be that you’ve forgotten to turn around and look at the one person that matters: you.
Here’s the secret no one told you about finding your ideal partner: to find the person you want, you have to be a match to the person you want.
Let’s see how this might play itself out. We’ll take 3 things you might want in a life partner, then flip them around to see what it would look like if you showed up as the ideal match to each.
He needs to be trustworthy.
Trust is extremely important in a relationship. You want to be able to trust that your partner will do what he says he’s going to do. You’re going to share your life with him, after all, and with it all the things that are important to you. You have to be able to trust him.
What would it look like if you showed up as the match to a trustworthy man?
A woman who is the match to a trustworthy man trusts herself. She’s confident in herself and her ability to discern whether a man is trustworthy. She gives him the space and time to demonstrate to her that he is trustworthy. She demonstrates what she wants by being a trustworthy woman. She follows through by doing what she says she’s going to do.
This is the kind of woman who attracts a trustworthy man.
He needs to be college-educated.
Education is important to you. You want to be able to hold intelligent, thoughtful conversations with your partner. College was an important experience to you that was more than just an education – you want to be able to relate to your partner in this way.
Are you the match to a college-educated man?
A woman who is the match to a college-educated man can hold intelligent, thoughtful conversations. She’s confident in her own intelligence and enjoys expressing it; not because she’s insecure and needs external validation, but because she enjoys bonding through meaningful conversation and witty banter. She listens to her partner and is genuinely interested in his perspective, and what he has to say.
This is the kind of woman who attracts a college-educated man.
He needs to be caring.
I love this one, especially for we strong-willed independent sorts. Deep down, beneath your fierce persona, is a woman who wants to be cared for. You want a partner. You want someone you can lean on; who thinks of your needs, and who will take care of you when you need it.
What would it look like if you showed up as the match to a caring man?
A woman who’s the match to a caring man allows him to care for her. She knows that she can care for herself but lets him care for her anyway. She’s grateful to him for what he does for her. She demonstrates what she wants by reciprocating – she thinks of his needs, and cares for him. She doesn’t do it to even the score or because she thinks she has to; she does it because she wants to care for her partner.
This is the kind of woman who attracts a caring man.
Be the match to the person you want.
It’s so simple. It’s so obvious. Yet we forget.
The secret no one told you about finding your ideal partner is that in order to find the person you want, you have to be a match to the person you want.
I would love to help you get clear on what you want in a life partner, and help you show up in your life as the match to this person.
My 6-week 1-1 coaching program, Find Your Life Partner, is designed to do just that and more. Get on my calendar for a free consultation, and I’ll share all the details with you.