When I talk with successful women about dating, there is often an element of chaos in the way they talk about it.
I hear things like: I don’t know where to meet good men. I have to hurry up or all the good ones will be gone. I’m too picky. Dating is hard. I don’t have time to date. I can’t tell if he wants to be with me or not. I don’t know if I want to be with him.
These types of thoughts create an experience for you inside your head. One of urgency, resistance, and confusion.
But these thoughts are totally optional.
Remove the Chaos
Let me remove the element of chaos for you surrounding dating. There are three simple elements to finding your life partner:
- You have to be ready
- He has to be ready
- You have to meet each other
That’s it. Everything else is for dramatic effect.
You Have to Be Ready
First, you have to be ready to meet your life partner.
Picture this: you show up on a date in love with yourself. You know how amazing you are. You know what you have to offer in a life partnership. You know what you want in a life partnership. It’s ok if the person in front of you isn’t it, because you know your person is out there. It’s only a matter of time until you find each other. You allow yourself to enjoy the date and get to know the person in front of you. Your heart is open and free to love. You show up as yourself.
This is what it looks like to be ready to meet your life partner.
I spend the first 6 weeks of my 6-month program focusing solely on you, and getting you to the point where you show up on dates with confidence, whole and complete in who you are.
When you’re ready, there’s no confusion around who you are and what you want. You simply show up as yourself, communicate what you want, and allow the person in front of you to do the same.
He Has to Be Ready
Next, he has to be ready to meet his life partner.
The next element of chaos I see women adding to dating is drama around their date. I hear things like: He was only looking for a hookup. He was nice, but he wasn’t what I was looking for; I’ll never meet my person. He stood me up. He hasn’t texted back, he must not like me. I wonder what he thought about me. I wonder if he liked me.
Here’s the thing: when it’s your guy, you’ll know. When you meet each other, it will be obvious. It will be a “hell yes” for both of you. He won’t be keeping his options open with other women, because his focus will be 100% on you. If it’s not, he’s not your guy. Let me say that again: IF IT’S NOT, HE’S NOT YOUR GUY.
We are not here to settle. You’ve been down that road before. You know you’d rather be single for the rest of your life than settle for anything less than exactly Mr. Right. Let’s not be dramatic when you decide the date in front of you isn’t the one. Let’s just say goodbye and move on.
When he’s ready, you won’t be confused about who he is and what he wants. He will show you he’s ready through his behavior.
You Have to Meet Each Other
Finally, you have to meet each other.
This is the easiest step of all, yet I see women creating a lot of chaos around this.
You meet people every day, everywhere you go. There is an entire world online that connects you to anyone who wants to be connected with. It’s literally easier than it’s ever been to meet people. Stop telling yourself it’s hard.
It takes 1 second to find your life partner; one moment in time. That’s it. Every other moment is drama.
Whew… I went on a bit of a rant with this one! I get fired up about this stuff.
If you want more, schedule a free consultation and we’ll chat about how I can help you remove the drama and chaos from dating and help you find your forever love.