One of my favorite things about science is that it’s constantly evolving. We humans are so smart (sometimes too smart for our own good). We’ve come up with thousands of elaborate stories about how everything in the universe works.
We use math and physics to describe the motion of objects and particles. We use chemistry and biology to describe the inner workings of our brains and bodies. We use psychology and sociology to understand how we interact with each other and the world around us.
But is it all serving us? Is it possible that society has swung so far into the analytic left brain that we’ve lost the fundamental element of what it is to be human? Connection – with ourselves, others, and the world around us.
Leaps in technology gave rise to the internet. I feel blessed to have been born in the late 80’s; As a child I knew what it was like to not have a cell phone or the internet. My preteen years were marked by asking Jeeves, chatting with strangers in virtual AOL rooms (creepy right), and begging my parents to let me have a cell phone. The first iphone was released when I was in college. I remember what life was like without these modern “luxuries” that have now become necessities.
We now have social media and more ways than ever to “connect.” We can have hundreds of friends and access to images and descriptions and even videos of countless lives around the world. But is this connection? Suicide rates are at an all-time high in the United States, and still rising. People feel lonelier than ever.
In an effort to connect, we’ve actually disconnected from each other. We have relationships in our heads with fictitious egos that we see plastered across the internet. We compare ourselves to these fabricated lives. We feel inadequate. In an effort to be “part of the tribe” we remain silent, pretending our lives are “perfect” too, falling deeper into loneliness. Make it stop.
Let’s use science and technology as a power for good: to reconnect with each other. Instead of down-playing love as a chemical reaction in the brain, let’s open ourselves to greater possibilities. Quantum physics has a suggestion.
Quantum entanglement suggests that connection may be more “real” than you think.
Quantum Entanglement
If you’re not familiar with the basics of Quantum Mechanics, you might want to check out this article then come back. We’ll be here. If you do have a solid foundation, let’s press on.
What Quantum Entanglement Means for Photons
Karl Tate describes entangled particles in an article on Live Science: “In quantum physics, entangled particles remain connected so that actions performed on one affect the other, even when separated by great distances.”
One of the best ways to create and measure entangled particles is using a laser, a crystal, and some fancy optics. In this example, the particle is a photon, a piece of light.
Photons from the laser pass through a crystal and every now and then the crystal splits a single photon into two photons. When this happens, we get two entangled photons. If you’re a bit of a nerd like me and want all the details, check out this YouTube video by Scientific American for a great explanation of how this works.
Photons contain a property called polarity – think of it as either vertical or horizontal stripes. Photons don’t have a polarity until we actually measure them – this is part of the strangeness of quantum mechanics. Until we measure them, any given photon can be either horizontally or vertically polarized. Once we stop, they go back to their quantum state and can take on a different polarity if we measure them again a second later.
Quantum entanglement experiments prove some wild results.
These experiments demonstrate that when we humans measure one of the two entangled photons and determine it to be either horizontally or vertically polarized, the other instantaneously and always has the same polarization. We can repeat the measurement again on the same photon, get a different polarization, and its pair will still always match. It happens every time. Crazy right. Just like Tate said, actions performed on one of the photons affects the other. Scientists have demonstrated that this happens even when separated by great distances.
These findings are significant because they prove what’s called non-locality, connection at a distance. It means two things are connected without having to travel any physical distance to “communicate.”
What Quantum Entanglement Means for You and Me
This has some pretty exciting implications for human connection.
Thoughts, like photons, are massless bits of energy. String theory suggests that everything – you, me, atoms, electrons, elementary particles, all of it – can be broken down into a single string of circular energy. Picture it as a really tiny rubber band that wiggles all around. What makes the rubber band of energy take on physical properties in our macro world – like color, shape, and density – depends on how it vibrates. These variations in vibration make up the physical world. But it’s all the same core energy stuff.
If everything in the universe came from a single, infinitesimal point – suggested by the big bang theory – then we all came from the same single piece of energy. Like the entangled photons in the experiment above that came from one parent photon, what if every piece of energy in the universe came from a single, parent piece of energy?
If this story is true, then we are all connected non-locally.
This means that, if I tap into it with my conscious mind, I can become aware of my connection with all things – yep, even you! This is one of the fundamental properties of consciousness; that all things are connected.
Alright, I’m excited! What can I do about it?
Five Ways to Reconnect
I hope you’re able to use this information to free yourself of any limiting beliefs you may have about connection. You are connected to everything and everything is connected to you. You are not alone.
Here are five ways to start living this out in your everyday life.
1. Observe beauty in the world without labeling it
The next time you’re outside, look at a tree. Instead of immediately thinking the word “tree” try seeing it with curiosity. Allow yourself to observe the tree as it is – a beautiful, magnificent miracle of creation. You can try this with anything, but nature is often easiest, especially if you’re new to the exercise. Try it out with a flower, or even an insect. Don’t use words to describe anything, allow yourself to get lost in the experience of the thing itself; use all your senses to interact with it.
When you see yourself in an object the experience is called beauty. When you see yourself in another person the experience is love.
Deepak Chopra
Eckhart Tolle talks about this concept in his book A New Earth. He suggests that if we remove the labels from the thing we are observing, we move from having a relationship with the word we’re using to describe the thing to having an experience with the thing itself. This is real connection.
In last week’s article on how to heal emotional pain, I suggest using labels as a way to separate yourself from emotional pain so that you can process it. What I’m suggesting here is the same concept in reverse. Remove labels to reconnect with the world around you.
2. Next time you’re tempted to text someone, pick up the phone
Crazy thought, right? Who uses phones nowadays when we have a thousand other more efficient ways to communicate.
As an introvert and recovering perfectionist, I struggle a lot with this one. But I can honestly say that I’ve never regretted a phone call with someone I love. It’s not a matter of having the time for it, it’s simply a matter of doing it. Just do it. Pick up the phone. You’ll probably get a surprised voice on the other side, but that’s okay. They’ll likely be grateful you did.
Life on this physical plane is all about energy exchange. A text message is a baby amount of energy. It barely conveys meaning adequately. With voice, you get so much more – intonation, connotation, emotion. So much is carried on a sound wave. It’s such a deeper form of connection.
Make time for it. You won’t regret it. For thoughts on how to make better use of your time, check out this article!
3. Connect with an animal
As Eckhart Tolle calls them, animals are the “guardians of being.” I love this so much.
Growing up, I found it very difficult to open my heart to people. But I was always able to open my heart to my cats. I believe that animals are truly angels in physical form – and when they leave, they continue to protect on higher planes. One of my greatest teachers was and is my cat, Antony. I know many of you have or have had an animal in your life that has touched you in a very deep way.
Let’s cherish these connections with our furry guardians. I used to wonder if animals have souls like humans do. Armed with what I now know about consciousness and my personal experiences, I am confident that they are – as are all living things – conscious beings that have experiences just as we do, in their own unique way.
Let them teach you about their world and what connection means to them. If you’re blessed to have an animal in your life, take some time observing them. Let them teach you in their subtle ways. Domestic pets in particular have evolved to communicate vocally with humans, but this isn’t their primary form of communication. Let them teach you how they do it. In a way, words have disconnected us from the experience of connection that our fellow mammals still enjoy.
We have much to learn from them.
4. Start to question the limitations you’ve put on others with your mental constructs
Mother. Father. Sister. Son. Teacher. Boss. Coworker. These are all labels we’ve slapped on each other. They do nothing to tell us about the human being, only the role they play in our lives.
Have you limited your own ability to connect with the people around you by assigning them a label and confining your relationship with them to a specific role? A role and relationship that you’ve probably defined in your own head.
In reality, people are dynamic. People change and grow and evolve. People are infinite. Free them of your limitations, and free yourself to connect with them the human being, not the label or role.
5. Play around with quantum entanglement with someone who won’t think you’re crazy
This one’s fun.
You may have known a couple who finishes each other’s sentences or is always wearing matching outfits without meaning to. This couple for me is my parents. They’re absolutely ridiculous. I love when it happens too because they think it’s hysterical (it usually is).
Last summer at my best friend’s wedding, they both independently packed obnoxious neon lime green shirts and inadvertently wore them on the same evening at a bonfire. Being the small inner circle of people who know and love them the best, we naturally ridiculed them the entire night.
Play around with what this is for you. If the story of quantum entanglement is true, then yes you can tap into your partner’s thoughts. Give it a try! See what happens. If you can’t get it to “work,” you’ll at least have a splendid time trying.
Get Out There and Connect
Loneliness in our culture is a real problem. But it has solutions. There are now more people on this planet than ever before – we have an abundance of opportunities to connect.
The stories of quantum physics suggest that connection is a real property of this physical plane. But that story doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is the experience of life that you are having right now.
Write your story and let yourself live it. It doesn’t matter what science says. It doesn’t matter what the spiritual teachers say. What matters is your connection with yourself and everything around you. How you experience that is up to you. Free your mind to explore the infinite possibilities.
As always, let me know how these strategies work for you. Share your thoughts in a comment below or contact me!